"I'm not drunk I'm so sober IT FRIGHTENS ME" - Allah Pundit"it wasn't actually me who tried to kill a mouse with hairspray and a toaster-it was my drummer and my bass player" - Kristin Hersh
"Strange but true, Bob [Dylan]'s X-Mas album. David Hidalgo told me they listened to old Andy Williams X-Mas albums 4 inspiration." - Benjamin Reed Hunter
"Cheney makes more sense // with a Lecter enhancement // 'Torture worked, Clarice.'" - 12 Bit Haiku
"Es incredible que estoy circulando el mundo cada 90 minutos. Se ve tanta belleza al instante! (It's so amazing to realize that one navigates around the earth in 90 minutes! You see so much beauty in such a short time!)" - Astronaut José Hernández, from orbit
"Turns out I needed *fresh* dog fluid. So I had to stalk the dog in the yard with a cup. I've never seen him look at me w/such suspicion." - James Lileks
"Reason I love living in the future, #5,269: staying up late to play Castle Crashers on Xbox Live with my son, who is far far away at school." - Wil Wheaton
"it was getting super long... I mean, when you can tie your shoes with your goddamned toe hair, it's probably time for a shave." - Marty Beckerman
"Driving over the williamsburg bridge during an almost obscenely perfect setting sun. Sky the color of tangerine sherbet." - Moby
"CODA means child of Deaf adult. All 4 of my kids are CODAs but in my house, Mom does all the talking." - Marlee Matlin
"Larry King frightens me. I keep expecting him to say, 'We're gonna go to a quick commercial while I scare these crows off the corn.'" - Chris Hardwick
"Etiquette regarding Michael Jackson's father: what's a decent interval to wait before kicking Old Joe in the nuts. I'm ready now." - Michael McKean
"when's MSNBC going to employ a liberal hitler sympathizer?" - Atrios
"While I was in Tahiti I couldn't find a guitar so I grabbed whatever swam by... that screamed." - Steve Vai
"Sign of My Personal Apocalypse: I now work in the same office as Heckuva Job Brownie" - David Sirota
"Every wingnut who screams 'give me my country back!' should be forced to live on an Indian reservation for a week." - Ara Rubyan
"Note to Sean Hannity: Bert from Sesame Street called, he wants his laugh back." - Tom Tomorrow
"Is it unfair to Joe McCarthy to compare Glenn Beck to him? After all McCarthy was a US Senator and Beck is just a gas bag" - Matt Browner Hamlin
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